Have The Two Of Made Any Attempts To Save Your Marriage?
This is important and I'll tell you why. You and your spouse stood before whitnesses and made vows to spend the rest of your lives together as husband and wife. In the name of marraige itself, the two of you have a responsibility to try save marriageeverything the two of you can think of to save the marraige before giving up. After all the best way to handle divorce is to avoid it!
Get Into Marriage Counseling
Both of you need to sit down with a professional who doesn't have any personal ties with either one of you. Fully participate too in any exercises the couselor wants the two of you to do. Some of them may seem stupid but there is a reason for them and you'll see that reason as time with the counselor goes on. In the process, you'll both learn a lot about your marriage, and yourselves and that's always good. And if after all of this work, the marriage can't be saved, at least you'll both know that you did everything possible to save it before you gave up.
Start Doing For YOU.
You've spend how ever many years doing for you AND your spouse. It's time to do some things for you without reguard to your spouse. Ladies, have you wanted a short hair cut for the last few years but never got it because your husband liked your hair long? Go out and get that haircut! Guys, have you always wanted to grow a beard but your wife always liked your face clean shaven? Stop shaving and grow a beard. You're not doing this to anger your former spouse. Here's why you're doing it. You never did those things because doing them would have made your spouse unhappy. You're divorcing or divorced, you're not worried what your soon to be ex or ex thinks about your hair or your beard.
If There Are Kids Involved
This is a very difficult time for your children too. They are no doubt having some trouble learning to handle divorce. I have a suggestion that will help you and your children. Immerse yourself in your children's lives. Especially if they're small and young. Take them to the playground, take them to the movies, take them sleigh riding.
Do NOT Talk Trash About Your Kid's Mom Or Dad In Front Of The Kids
Even if your ex deserves it, refrain from talking trash about mom or dad in front of the children. Your kids don't want to hear it and it may cause your kids to resent you or your spouse. Don't inquire to your kids about your ex's personal life. It puts the children in an uncomfortable position.
Divorce has you going through a lot of negative feelings. Anger, Jealousy, and Sadness just to name a few. It's not an easy time and it's not meant to be but it is survivable. If you do it right, you can maintain a civil and non romantic relationship with your ex and learn a lot about yourself in the process. Good luck to you.
We cover all stages of the process from trying to save your relationship, through legal proceedings and dealing with the effects of divorce.
As divorce rates soar it is becoming increasingly important to be able to handle divorce in a sensible and pragmatic way in order to minimise the pain and disruption it may cause
How to Handle Divorce
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